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' The only problem is, when you are drunk, burgers are well nice." Rob Beckett , Pleasance Courtyard25"I see these signs on the back of trucks which say, IF YOU CANNOT SEE MY MIRRORS. Whenever I see those signs I immediately run up behind the truck and if I can't see his mirrors, I start unloading/stealing his stuff." Benny Boot, Udderbelly – Pasture26"Ever hated yourself so much that your apartment wants you to move out?
That is one dedicated racist." Mark Nelson, Underbelly59 "Apparently the average price of a slave worldwide is less than the average price of an i Pod.
Fair enough, but you try teaching your slave 12,000 songs." Mark Nelson, Underbelly60"If Windolene cleans windows would a trampolene clean the homeless?
Tally ho." Mark Smith, Pleasance Courtyard3 "I was very naive sexually.
"Joe Lycett, Pleasance Courtyard2 "I've been keeping a count of the prostitutes I've been sleeping with.
I feel like I'm in an abusive relationship with Channel 4." Hayley Ellis, Pleasance Courtyard5 "I really fancy Ed Miliband.
My first boyfriend asked me to do missionary and I buggered off to Africa for six months." Hayley Ellis, Pleasance Courtyard4 "Gok Wan has a programme telling us what to wear, now what to eat.Indeed, the very act of receiving the Humility Award is something that the recipient of the Humility Award could never do.Therefore, ladies and gentlemen, it gives me great pleasure to announce that nobody can ever receive this award.Everybody hates Americans until they need to watch a good film, listen to some decent hip hop or go to war.What do you get when you add sunshine and personal space to a Brit? Add health care and education and you get a Canadian." Dana Alexander, Udderbelly Pasture24"My girlfriend worries about me cheating on a night out, but I always try to reassure her and say to her: 'Why would I go out and have a burger when I have steak at home?Which happens a surprising amount in Edinburgh during August.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating