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I myself have felt firsthand very high passionate desire, which then wanes. Honestly, it’s rare to find something this funny and sad at the same time. We come all the way back to the problem I battle with people, mostly men, every day: Everyone knows monogamy doesn’t work, but no one wants to try a different system. So I’ll just be monogamous and have boredom and drama and cheating and breakups and divorces and fuck up my kids and…” Like the rest of the practitioners at the 16 research sites across the country that Adriaan Tuiten contracted to conduct the studies, Goldstein had to make sure that every applicant was in a stable relationship.

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It amazed me that a woman could end up being so in love with a man that, initially, she wouldn't have seriously considered dating.

In fact, I was so surprised by this that I initially doubted the truth of the stories.

It’s always nice when science reinforces the things I’ve been saying for years.

It happens so often these days I’ve pretty much stopped reporting it. Dietrich Klusmann, a psychologist at the University of Hamburg-Eppendorf in Germany, has provided a glimpse into the bedrooms of longtime couples.

It has been created to combat the exact boredom I talk about…that experienced by women in three-year or longer monogamous relationships. But for women who’ve been with their partners between one and four years, a dive begins — and continues, leaving male desire far higher. This is a corollary to another concept I’ve explained for years: The more often you see a woman, the faster she will become sexually bored with you.

While interviewing one woman, “Thinking about your desire now,” Miller said, “would you say it is absent, very low, low, reasonable or present? That’s why if she divorced her husband (which most women end up doing) and had sex with a new man, all of a sudden she would be completely sexually healthy, both mentally and physically. Evolutionary psychologists argue that this comes down to innate biology, that men are just made with stronger sex drives — so men will settle for the woman who’s always near. Why do you think I talk about the once-a-week rule for FBs and MLTRs?

I agreed because I wanted to give it a chance, and I hadn't been on a date in a while.

The first date went OK, so we kept seeing each other.

Their results might have to be tossed out because, with or without chemical aids, new lovers bring surges of lust. So they have to make sure to only find monogamous women, or else it would ruin their entire study.

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