Playing it cool while dating

On the dating blog 30 Dates, Miss Twenty-Nine describes a now-platonic friendship with a former Tinder interest, who revealed to her upon finally meeting as friends that he saw the app as little more than a game.

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We’re not all calculating, manipulative scumbags, but men often subconsciously lead women on.

And often, also subconsciously, women let it happen, over and over again, in the hope that the man in question may actually like them.

They get to know each other, go on a few dates, and then all of a sudden he seems to take a step back, seemingly ‘playing it cool’.

A lot of women start to want him all the more, because they seemingly can’t have him.

For replying to messages, it’s best to leave it between five minutes and an hour and a half.

It’s also important to vary your response times to show him that you have a varied and busy life.

If he’s asked you out before and used body language to show you that he’s attracted to you – eye contact, casual touching, that kind of thing – playing it cool should work well.

In 2014, a study by researchers Dai, Dong and Jia reported that participants that already felt a connection to the person playing hard to get, found that aspect to only make the person more desirable.

A little harmless banter can have the desired effect but anything more than that can send the wrong message.

In the context of dating games, your love interest is your adversary, and you have to find a way to outmaneuver them in the arena of love.

It’s like staring at that big red button that under no circumstances should ever be pressed – you’re desperate to press it simply because it’s off limits.

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