Teen advice on dating older guys
Most of the teenage girls I work with who are dating older men are seeking something they feel like they aren’t getting from home, and while it may seem impossible to please your ever changing and complex teenager, try to talk with her, listen to and understand her.
Try to talk to your daughter, express your concerns.
Let her know that you only have her best interests at heart.
Eventually he left her for a woman his own age and that should have been the end of it, but now she is talking about dating his OLDER brother who is married with a kid, but text messaged her one night at 3Am, “I think you are so sexy, and I’ve been fantasizing about you”, from his wive’s phone nonetheless.
Once again, all bad signs, but she’s an emotional, hormonal, vulnerable, teenager trying to belong so she see’s this as another challenge. Chemistry doesn’t know have rigid age boundaries so there is a chance that there are genuine feelings there.
The first guy I properly dated was exactly a year younger than me (we shared the same birthday, I thought it was meant to be) and the last guy I dated was four years younger than me. ) and thought I’d increase my age limit to 39 to see if there were any silver foxes about. You could smell the desperation through the phone – it was like they had their mum breathing down their necks asking for grandkids.
I recently found out that a musician I have a crush on is 21. However, women dating younger men isn’t weird to me – my dad is younger than my mum, my uncle is way younger than my aunty and my brother is younger than his wife. Me and my best friends have a running joke that we always fancy hot, younger guys (We’ll always have a thing for fresh-faced indie boys, God love ’em). (I’ve always had a thing for Patrick Dempsey.) Holy. ‘I’ve dated older guys who have gone in way too hard way too soon with talking about getting married,’ agrees Katherine, 25. It didn’t take long before I moved my maximum age back down to 34.I told her that had to say something about his motives, personality, etc., but of course she didn’t see this as a red flag, but was instead flattered that someone who could date anyone his age or older, chose to date her.After several months of bliss and sex, he started treating her badly and her moods were very erratic, varied by however they were doing at the moment.During the teenage years, young people are trying to come into their own and often rebel against their parents and other adults, which is why they often chose friends and relationships that their parents disapprove of, including dating older men.I hate when I am working with a teenage girl and she tells me she is dating an older man, usually because I know that this relationship, while to her may be idyllic and dreamy, is more often a disaster waiting to happen on so many levels.Recently a client of mine who is 17, started dating a 23 year old man, and while the age difference isn’t drastic, one has to think, what would a 23 year old man who could date anyone 18 and up, want with a 17 year old high school student? Of course they had a lot of that, often unprotected, but luckily she never got pregnant although she hasn’t gotten tested for any sexually transmitted diseases.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating